I know I had said I would do this daily, but let's face it; who the fuck wants to do that?
So instead, we'll leave it more strictly as a vent log. It's easier than my actual journal, and a touch more convenient and easier to hide. No one I know exists here, so no one that matters is reading.
My main issue today… Well, I'll admit, I feel rather stupid about it. My best friend went to stay at another friend of ours this past day or so, and I… I don't want to say I'm annoyed about it, because I"m not nor do I have the right to be.. But I'm more… Worried? Feel left out? I don't know how to describe it really. It's like, the three of us are friends, and even thought I would NOT want to go out to her house, I can't help but feel left out or whatever… I've always felt like a third wheel with those two, and for some reason or another, I feel like shit today because she's over there. LOL I feel like a schmuck just typing this up. Seriously, what's wrong with me? Why should I even? Good for her, she's getting out of that shit hole that she lives in now, I should be happy…
But I'm not. And I really, REALLY wish I knew why...
So instead, we'll leave it more strictly as a vent log. It's easier than my actual journal, and a touch more convenient and easier to hide. No one I know exists here, so no one that matters is reading.
My main issue today… Well, I'll admit, I feel rather stupid about it. My best friend went to stay at another friend of ours this past day or so, and I… I don't want to say I'm annoyed about it, because I"m not nor do I have the right to be.. But I'm more… Worried? Feel left out? I don't know how to describe it really. It's like, the three of us are friends, and even thought I would NOT want to go out to her house, I can't help but feel left out or whatever… I've always felt like a third wheel with those two, and for some reason or another, I feel like shit today because she's over there. LOL I feel like a schmuck just typing this up. Seriously, what's wrong with me? Why should I even? Good for her, she's getting out of that shit hole that she lives in now, I should be happy…
But I'm not. And I really, REALLY wish I knew why...